New Here? Dear Wendy is a relationship advice blog. You can read about me here , peruse the archives here and read popular posts here. You can also follow along on Facebook and Instagram. Thanks for visiting! It could actually be a great match in that you could enjoy the fantasy together through dirty talk or porn or whatever. The problem, however, is that your girlfriend seems to be taking the fantasy into the realm of reality by admitting that she checks out black men at her nursing gig and that she wants a black baby. Is she serious about that? If anything is going to make you insecure it should be that your girlfriend seems a little, uh, touched.
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I think we should date and have sex with whomever we want and not carry prejudiced expectations into our relationships. I also worry that she might see me as less masculine and less well-endowed because of my race. I eventually asked her about these issues, and we had a tense conversation. I tried to ask if she had ever checked herself for possible prejudice where her sexual desires are concerned, and she shut the conversation down by accusing me of trying to control her. Any advice? So in addition to confronting your new girlfriend about her attitudes and assumptions… you might want to give some thought to your own?
M y wife," Carla," and I are both white. She's 32, a redhead, and sort of petite. I didn't know a lot of stuff about Carla's background before we were married -- she didn't talk about it -- but, after a while, she started revealing things. Along with some of the other white girls, while Carla was in high school she went out with black jocks, "just to see what it would be like. The problem was that right away her guy got possessive and would scare off any other guy that tried to date her. Carla isn't real assertive, so she just went along with it.
I had been with my partner for six years when she announced, abruptly, that it was over. I remember she was crying. I was not: I was too stunned. It was as if, in the rulebook of how to end a relationship, she had torn out the last chapter. Disagreements, rows, eating meals in silence, sleeping in separate rooms: these things were all missing from our end sequence. So, at 52, I found myself unexpectedly single.